The one Monica had slapped a fresh coat of blue paint over, though I could still see the chipped nose underneath and the faint outline of the little red hat bleeding through where she’d been too lazy to prime him. The one that had been “decorating” her yard for six months.
Nobody stopped me. Monica’s Tesla was gone, probably off running errands with all that free electricity in the battery.
“Mom, you sound too cheerful.”
I carried the gnome home and set him down near the outdoor outlet on the side of my garage. Then I spent the better part of an hour getting everything else ready.
When I finally stepped back, the gnome looked perfectly innocent sitting beside the outlet.
That was exactly the point.
Monica had no idea what kind of surprise that little gnome had waiting for her.
“Mom…”
****
Around lunchtime, my daughter Diane called.
“Mom, you sound too cheerful. What are you doing?”
“Just tidying up the yard, sweetheart.”
“You’re plotting something. I can hear it.”
“Only if Monica gives me a reason to.”
Invisible had lasted long enough.
“Mom…”
I laughed and told her I loved her. Then I hung up before she could talk me out of anything.
For one small moment, watering my tomatoes, I did wonder if I had lost my mind. Sixty-four years old, and rigging up a garden gnome like a cartoon trap.
Was I being petty? Or was I finally, after all these years, refusing to be invisible?
I decided invisible had lasted long enough.
“Not tonight.”
My late husband used to tease me about it. I would send back the wrong order at a restaurant for him, argue with a mechanic who overcharged Diane, stand up for anyone who needed it — anyone except myself.
Somewhere along the way, keeping the peace had become an excuse for letting people decide what I would tolerate.
I looked at the gnome by the garage.
“Not tonight,” I told him.
She looked so comfortable.
****
The sun went down. I turned off the porch light, poured myself a glass of iced tea, and sat in the dark behind the geraniums. I felt like a woman a third my age on a stakeout.
All Monica had to do was leave my property alone.
The Tesla drifted in with its headlights off.
